Alright, FUCK. This story has been covered ad nauseum, but since Killswitch Engage was a crucial band in my personal evolution away from all things Nu and towards Hood Metal supremacy, I’d be remiss not to mention the development. That’s right, your boy Juice got his start in the metal game backing such legends as Sw1tched, Union Underground, Ill Nino, Dry Kill Logic, Spineshank, Static X and American Head Charge. I know, I have fucking EXQUISITE taste. I digress.
So here’s the deal. Things started getting creepy back in February of 2010 when then KsE frontman, Howard Jones, stepped down from touring due to a rather Hood Metal indiscretion involving some bombed out and depleted porn star. A brief hiatus from the band soon followed, and the basement dwellers went hog wild with a frenzy of rumors, allegations, and the always hilarious “black dood impregnating bitches” one-liners. Racism is never not funny. FACT.
The band wisely kept their mouths shut regarding HoJo’s Alabama Black Snake while they toured with Phil Labonte of All That Remains. Then, as the smoke seemingly began to clear, they welcomed Howard back into the fold and hit the road in May. All the while, ex-Killswitch frontman, Jesse Leach (known for his work on the band’s first release and its modern metal classic follow-up, “Alive or Just Breathing“) was getting some major pub for his “in-the-works” collaboration with current KsE guitarist/certified lunatic Adam Dutkiewicz, dubbed Times of Grace. Not that the “BRING JESSE BACK” fire ever died, but this certainly fanned the flames.
The band chugged along for a while, apparently refocused and working on a new record. Then, on January 4th of this year, we get slapped in the face with this lil’ statement released through Roadrunner Records:
“To our family, friends and fans: We have decided to continue on without Howard Jones as the singer of Killswitch Engage. We love Howard and are thankful for the nine years that we’ve had him in the band. Out of respect for everyone involved we will not be discussing the specific reasons behind this decision.
Howard is a part of our family and always will be, and we wish him well. He has left big shoes to fill, so we certainly have our work cut out for us to find the next singer of Killswitch, something we plan on making priority #1 going forward. Most importantly, thanks to all of you for all the support throughout the years and for sticking by us for all this time.
We really do appreciate it and we very much look forward to having a new record for all of you in the not too distant future that we can all be proud of. Sincerely, Adam, Joel, Mike & Justin.”
The news and subsequent new vocalist rumors surprised only those whose heads were buried deep within their own asshole. A month or so of weak posturing and a bunch of horseshit about “auditioning singers” followed. Here, Adam Dutkiewicz talks exclusively with Noisecreep about their “search”:
“Honestly, we didn’t want to jump into anything too quickly. We were in a position where we could take our time and try out as many singers as we wanted. There are a lot of talented singers out there, and we didn’t want to rush everything. We ended up mulling it over a bit, and we tried out a few different people.”
#CHILDPLEASE Some names were thrown out there including Labonte and Tommy Vext (Vext, ex-Divine Heresy)… but I saw through that bullshit DAY FUCKING ONE. There was no way Jesse wasn’t returning. Despite his emo-bullshit about dealing with his voice, life, family, and general flightiness, I knew he would see the light and make the most of their fleeting moments of relevance.
So, after a bit of a self-indulgent, ambiguous jerk-off session, Jesse Leach shut down his Twitter & Facebook pages. At this point, the KsE/Leach faithful were so backed up they were dry humping the basement water heater. Sweatpants were certainly out of the question.
Then, early this week, AS PROPHESIED BY YOURS TRULY, it was announced that Jesse Leach would, in fact, officially reclaim the Killswitch Engage throne. The announcement was made in fairly clever fashion through a single photo of the band, featuring Jesse front and center, posted on the their official site, killswitchengage.com. Unemployed late-twenty-somethings everywhere subsequently ejaculated all over themselves in a flurry of erotic pleasure.
Personally, I found it difficult to give a shit about this whole ordeal. I thought that Times of Grace record was a snoozer and this reunion comes long past the last time anyone gave a shit. I know, it’s a horrible, throw-away culture. Getting pumped for the resurrection of a band I adored a decade ago is about as pathetic as the old dicks getting wet over Diamond Dave’s reunion with Van Halen. SHIT’S OVER, BRO. Stick a fuckin’ fork in it. That said, I’ll still probably spin Killswitch’s new record, and probably love it… for nostalgia’s sake.
You hype machine following tricks ain’t foolin’ me into thinking this is important… HOOD STATUS DENIED